Laying the Groundwork
Since last Christmas I’ve been thinking that at some point I’ve got to open up to my parents and tell them about Katie. I decided that I had to achieve this goal after talking to a friend of my wife’s from high school, who is underdoing hormone treatment as a transgender man. I had the wonderful opportunity to talk to our friend about Katie during our holiday family visit last year, and through our conversation I realized I needed to be open to my family, just as he had done with his family.
I was thinking about telling my folks during our visit to Ohio later this year for the holidays, but that idea changed last week. My mom called early last week asking if they could visit us for the weekend, which was a bit on short notice, but since we didn’t have any plans, we said “sure, come on down”. Throughout the week, I couldn’t help but think that this was an opportunity, since I only get to see my parents a couple times a year, to sit them down and explain to them the changes I’ve gone through the last few years; changes that have made my life so much happier.
On Friday my mind was going around in circles, and as someone who likes to plan everything possible, I was working out in my mind how this was going to go down. We went out for a nice dinner on Friday night, and then did some sightseeing on Saturday. We toured Sun Studios, checked out the Peabody hotel ducks, went to a movie (Despicable Me 2), and then finished with a nice dinner Saturday night. In the end, I just ran out of time. There were many occasions when the words I wanted to say were at the tip of my tongue, but I just hesitated at the last moment.
At least during some conversations over dinner, certain things were said that made me think that coming out is a good idea. Conversation about being happy with who you are, no matter what others think helped me to picture a positive outcome when I do open up.
So…what did I take out of the experience? I think I was able to laydown the groundwork for what I wanted to do by the end of the year. I worked out what I wanted to say, and how to say it, so I don’t think this was a lost opportunity. At least I feel as if I’m making the personal progress that I want to make in order to grow as an individual.