Q&A with Hannah & Katie
Hannah and I recently did a little Q&A session just asking each other some questions. I think this will be a great way to get to know someone new and get to discuss some topics on a more personal level. Here’s the first question I asked Hanna, and some additional thoughts from me, enjoy! Oh, and if you have any questions, about anything really, don’t hesitate to ask either one of us.
I was chatting with my friend Hannah not long ago and I just had to ask her “do you ever have issues with the term crossdresser”? I sometimes have issues with the term because of what you often find when searching for the term “crossdressing/crossdresser” on sites like tumblr, Flickr, or Facebook. You’ll find a ton of pictures that are straight up porn than anything else. When it comes to crossdressing, I don’t do it to take half naked pictures to post online (I’m not suggesting it’s wrong), I do it because Katie is a part of my identity. She is so much more than a sex symbol, character, or persona that I experience when I have the time to dress up. So when I come out to a friend, what am I going to say I do? Hannah’s response was:
I do love the term because it has the word ‘dress in it…but I know exactly what you mean. I would love to create a new word for girls like us. The term suggests fetishism and sexualization of what we do.
The thing I love about her answer, after taking time to think about the issue, was the very first part. It’s so simple, and not over thought. We sometimes live too much in our own heads, which is sometimes counterproductive. Enjoy the things that you love, no matter what anyone else thinks, be it shoes, makeup, fashion, and of course dresses.
I could write on and on about how I see terms like transgender or crossdresser. The thing is that I’m still working on figuring it out, and if I try to over think things too much and place myself in a category, the more that I’ll lose sight on a broader community of people. I’ve had the pleasure of befriending so many wonderful individuals from all sorts of different backgrounds that I wouldn’t want to overlook. When I do come out to someone new in person, it is never easy to sum it up into one term, although I often do use the terms crossdresser and trans to start a broader (and intensive) conversation to explain how I see myself.
In a perfect word, I would love to be like Janelle Monáe. She is a different and fearless artist, and has battled people from labeling her (this BuzzFeed article is really cool) . We are all trying to be fearless.
So…who am I? I am at most times my male self, but not entirely so; and I am also Katie, but again not entirely so. It’s not always clear living in the middle, flowing from one end to another. I’m not entirely sure what you would call that, or if it even matters. I just need to try and ignore it, and enjoy life. Keep in simple even if it seems complicated.