credit: jon madison

credit: jon madison

It’s always nice to have an unexpected chance to introduce Katie to new friends.  This past weekend we planned some fun activities with some coworkers to go to a baseball game.  We had a good time at the game on Saturday and we had planned a relaxing Sunday doing the regular apartment chores (and to start reading the Hunger Games).  We got an unexpected message on Sunday from some of my wife’s friends in northern Mississippi that they were on their way into town to do some bowling, and wanted to know if we wanted to join them.

One of the friends (let’s call her M) knows about Katie and has been very supportive and a great friend.  The other two tagging along (we’ll call them L and T) are a great gay couple that I had met a couple times and were great hosts when we were invited to their home last year.

As I’ve mentioned before, over the last six months I’ve wanted to share Katie with people beyond these apartment walls.  I have a short list of friends I would be comfortable coming out to, and L and T were on that list.  For some reason I’ve felt very comfortable coming out to our homosexual friends.  I guess because I know they will be understanding of my situation.

On the way to the bowling alley, I knew that I wanted to tell them about Katie and started to think about how and when.  I wanted to show them that I was more than K’s husband, that nice guy who is shy and doesn’t talk much (a part of my character I’ve tried to work on).

I hadn’t bowled in about 10 years, so it took a couple of games to get the hang of it again. While I was sitting there, waiting my turn, I kept thinking about how to bring up Katie.  I didn’t want to just blurt out, “I’m a crossdresser, hooray!!”.  I ended up running out of time, our games were up.  Luckily I had another chance because they were going to grab a bite to eat at a place nearby.

During dinner I asked M if L and T would like to see a picture of my friend Katie.  I wanted to see their reaction to the pictures I have on my phone, without telling them that’s me.  At first L looked at the picture, and I’m guessing he didn’t think much of that woman.  Then he kept looking at it, then eventually he looked up at me, then back to the phone, then back to me, then his mouth dropped.  It was a priceless expression.  After the initial shock, we talked about crossdressing, drag queens, makeup, we even made some rough plans for halloween.  It was a very rewarding experience.  One of the things they pointed out that I never realized is that my smile is different when I am Katie, which was a very interesting observation.  Maybe subconsciously I am happier and relaxed, free to express those emotions on the outside.

I am glad that I didn’t chicken out, and let the opportunity to tell them in person about myself slip by.  I think years ago I would have missed those kinds of opportunities, whatever the topic.  I guess that’s a sign that I’ve gained some confidence over the years, although I know I have more work to do.  At least I’m happy to have made some new friends. 🙂

Have a great week,



About katieinthehall

I'm a rediscovered crossdresser in my early 30's looking to express my thoughts as I move through this journey of discovery.

Posted on April 30, 2012, in Coming out, Family/Friends and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. Friends and secrets can be very sacred. Since you and your wife have decided to share this part of yourself with T and I; I will tell you guys something. I read your above entry and I don’t know if I need Prozac or what, (lol) but I started to cry. I don’t know if I’m just emotional this week with everything going on with T’s work, I hate it when I get emotional and don’t like for people to know that about me. I feel very honored that someone like you and K would come into our lives. Now I look forward to being around our 4 good friends, yourself, K, M, and Katie. 🙂 I sincerely enjoy reading your blog. Have a terrific week.

    • Thank you L for brining a smile to my face with your comment. Over the last couple of years we’ve really started to make some great friends in our new home. I hope things work out the best for T. Till we bowl again….

  2. M sounds pretty awesome….and I feel like she’s an excellent bowler, probably a pro…

  3. Carlos Ariana

    This is awesome Katie!
    I can totally identify with the “I didn’t want to just blurt out, ‘I’m a crossdresser, hooray!!’.” It is so weird having to tell someone you’ve known a long time. It’s not like telling someone, “Oh I play guitar in a local band.” I loved how you improvised and just showed them a picture. Brilliant.

    • Thanks Ariana. The reaction they gave me along with the compliments were invaluable. It’s a nice feeling when you can push yourself a little further out of that warm closet every once in a while. We’ll see what I do next to push that boundary.

  1. Pingback: Makeoverpalooza « katieinthehall

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