My Husband Katie
I just finished reading Helen Boyd’s book “My Husband Betty” and I thought I would write a few words about it, especially since it was such a highly suggested book. It has given me a different perspective on the issues of crossdresseres and their relationships with their spouses.
This book really helped reinforce the idea of respect and openness. I’ve always been open with my thoughts and feelings with my wife, and this book really reinforced how important it is to have that kind of relationship and trust with a parter. This relationship has allowed each of our concerns to be addressed and to live with a balance that works best for the two of us. This has allowed us to share some fun things together, like our enjoyment of makeup.
Helen writes at length about the different communities that have had to fight over the years. The feminist movement, gay, lesbian, and bisexual communities have all fought a public fight over the years to gain respect in the public eye, and are still fighting. I’m beginning to realize that in order to gain respect in the world, I’m going to have to stand up for what I believe in, even in a public setting. It does me no good to hide Katie away from the world, and shy away anytime the topic of gender differences comes up.
This idea has made me realize that when I do go out as Katie (to a friend’s house or pub) I’ll be going out as a crossdresser, not as a women. I don’t think my goal is to be 100% women when dressed as Katie. I could never pass as a women (a wig and makeup can only go so far), and I don’t think that’s my goal. Katie is just one part of many that makes up who I am. When I do eventually venture out, I’ll be doing so with a group of supportive friends, and if I am confident in myself, then I don’t have to pass in order to have a good time.
While reading the book, I at times became really dizzy and confused, especially when it came to labels. Helen does a great job at defining all the different labels, but after a while it becomes too much, and in the end they become less important. There are so many people that fit into the Transgender community, that coming up with a new label and definition for everyone becomes frustrating and confusing. I am me, a complex person with all kinds of emotions, nuff said.
These are just a few thoughts I had while reading this book. Now I’ll have to see if K wants to read it as well. I would definitely recommend this book to anyone new to these gender issues.